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August 04, 2010

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Kelly

I'm a little late to this dociussisn, but I had to put my 2a2 in. I think, like many others, that black mothers don't breastfeed because they don't get enough support, information, or exposure to breastfeeding. I know a lot of people think it has to do with opportunity or economics and I don't doubt that those things are a factor. But even in my educated, professional, black middle class world when I had my first daughter 8 years ago my exposure to breastfeeding was very limited. Very few of my family, friends and co-workers breastfed and those who did, were sure to do it behind closed doors away from everyone. The closest I ever came to seeing a baby nursing was walking in to a dimly lit room and seeing my cousin with a huge blanket draped over her and her baby. And once I heard a co-worker talk about how convenient it was that the handicapped stall in the bathroom had an outlet in it, so she could go in there to pump milk. I still can't figure out why she preferred this to simply closing her office door.Even amongst the women I knew who breastfed, very few did it for more than a few months. Three months seemed to be the average in my family. And in social and professional circles, 6 months was the max the appearance of teeth seemed to indicate that it was time to stop nursing and start getting serious with food.When my daughter was born, virtually everyone in my family told me that poor milk supply ran in our family and it would be hardly worth it to try. I had very low expectations for nursing but tried it more out of curiosity than anything. I never expected to go longer than 6 months at the very best. I nursed my first daughter for 3 years and my second child will be 2 years old shortly and is still nursing. I have endured teasing, taunting, and deep heartfelt advice about why I should stop nursing after 6 months, and certainly after a year. With my first child, nursing beyond a year caused a huge rift in my marriage that it took some work to repair.Finding support was virtually impossible. I knew no one who nursed beyond 6 months. I'd heard awful things about La Leche that they were extremists Milk Nazis. But I finally sought them out because I just needed to talk to someone who understood why I was continuing to nurse my daughter. That turned out to be a disaster though not for the reasons I thought. The only black woman in the room, I was clearly different, and slightly out of place. I grew up in a predominantly white neighborhood and so have never felt out of place being the only black person in the room but I did at this meeting. It was clear that I wasn't completely welcome. And then one of the children there started snatching toys from and being mean to my toddler and her mother and all the other women in the room suggested that my baby might be happier playing on her own, apart from the other children. Needless to say, I didn't go back.So where is a black woman who needs support and encouragement with breastfeeding supposed to get it? I first found it online. But as someone else mentioned, many black women don't have that resource. I try my best to be a resource to any women I know who need help or support with breastfeeding, and I think we, all of us who have breastfed or are breastfeeding, need to be responsible for helping those who need it. We need to not be too ashamed or afraid nurse our babies openly. We need to stop hiding in other rooms, or bathroom, or even behind blankets. I figure every time a girl or a young woman sees me nursing my baby it makes it more normal to her, so that one day, when she has children of her own, she will have the memories of seeing nursing happen and it won't seem such an odd thing to try. Some of my happiest moments have been when I've seen the attitudes of those around me change about nursing, knowing I played a part in it. Whether it's a family member who went from sneaking formula to my first child to telling everyone about how good breastmilk is for babies when I had my second; or a cousin coming to me for advice about breast pumps or nipple confusion I love seeing how, with even just a little exposure, attitudes can change.

Dany

NurseBeckyJanuary 29, 2010Im a nurse and have worn crocs since I started. I say the heck with aetthesics just as long as its comfortable. Crocs are the most comfy shoe especially that im 7 months pregnant now. They provide room for widening feet and keep swelling in feet and ankles down. I dont understand the whole needle stick thing. You would basically have to throw it like a dart at your foot to make it stick through. And yes the part about tripping is true but you learn real quick not to shuffle your feet when you walk.

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